An Ode to Borderlands & Not Randy Pitchford
Here is my ode to the amazing game series that is Borderlands. How many countless hours I've spent on that game by myself and with friends. So many good times, and so many guns to collect. Borderlands 1, to my recollection, is the first looter shooter that I've played. I remember when Borderlands 1 came out, I was blown away by just how many guns you could collect in it. When I bought it, I was instantly hooked and I went on to buy the rest of the games when they came out. I still go back and play them. Also fuck Randy Bitchford...sorry, I meant Pitchford for being garbage human being, and for lying about his games.
One of my favorite things to do in the Borderland series was challenging my friends to fights that they couldn't win. I'm one of those people who grind like crazy and my friends weren't, so when I would challenge them I would be so far ahead that I could kill'em in one shot. I know I'm a dick, but you know who's worse than me? Fuckin' Randy Bitchford is far worse than little old me.
When I heard that Borderlands 3 was in the making, oh boy was I ready to jump on board and get back to shooting bandits in the face with crazy ass weapons. I really hope that Borderlands 3 has 96.5% MORE WUB WUB & Clap Traps. Also fuck Randy Bitchford...ugh sorry guys & gals, I meant to say Pitchford. Once you start saying "Bitchford," it's hard to stop saying it. Where was I, ah yes, Borderlands 3...It's going to be hard to top the insanity of the previous games, but I have faith in Gearbox because they know how to conjure up some wacky ass shit.
On a final note, to quote the amazing scholar Scooter," Catch a rideeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee," which is what my ass will be doing with my friends once Borderlands 3 comes out.
Here are some funny memes: